A Simple Method for Changing Your Mindset to Become Who You Want to Be

How do you refer to yourself? How do you define yourself?

Dad. Mom. Executive. Salesperson. Marketer. Writer. Musician. Republican. Democrat. Independent. Religious. Spiritual. Atheist. Productive. Slacker. Lucky. Unlucky. Rich. Wealthy. Poor. Broke. Unhealthy. Healthy. Fit.

Notice how all of these terms evoke not just an idea but a feeling. Often we think of the terms we use to describe ourselves as adjectives without realizing they eventually manifest into nouns. It’s not just a description of you but an indication of who you are.

Labels matter. So I ask again, how do your refer to yourself? How do you define yourself?

In the first couple of newsletters, I’ve discussed how powerful mindset can be and how adopting a growth mindset is one of the most powerful changes you can make in your life. The next step in the Designed Mind process is to define what it is that you want to be and then become the type of person who is doing what you want to be or is where you want to be.

By taking the time to specifically define ourselves, we turn our mindset to being instead of becoming. It’s more than “fake it ‘til you make it.” If you can flip this switch to living in that mindset, there’s no faking, just being.

A great example is when I decided to start my fitness journey in January of 2023. I wasn’t “going on a diet.” I wasn’t starting to “work out more.” I told myself, “I am a healthy person.” A healthy person doesn’t diet - they eat a balanced diet and sensible meals. A fit person doesn’t just workout - they live a life that promotes fitness. When I flipped that switch, I no longer had to make a decision about whether I wanted pizza or a rice bowl with chicken and vegetables for lunch. A healthy person just gets the latter and goes on about their day. I no longer had to make a decision about whether I was going to work out or not. The decision was, “What workout am I going to do today? Bike? Run? Lift weights?”

I’m not saying that just calling yourself fit will make you fit. Labeling yourself as a fit person (or insert your adjective/noun here) doesn’t immediately make that happen. But when you apply that label, it shifts your mindset into thinking and acting in the way of that type of person. I call it “flipping a switch” because it is a whole mindset shift into being that type of person and not a superficial notion.

Think about the type of person who is what you want to be - say you want to be a musician. What does a musician do with their time every day? What things do they do that are habitual for them but a choice for you to do? They might wake up and pick up their guitar or sit at the piano first thing to start their day with their instrument of choice. They might deliberately practice a challenging riff or piece of music to hone their skills. When they listen to other people’s music they likely deliberately analyze the notes and chords. They might make notes to themselves about an idea they had or record it in their phone.

In Netflix’s “Song Exploder,” Lin Manuel Miranda details the development of the hit song “Wait For It” from his record breaking Broadway musical, “Hamilton.” Miranda explains he was listening to a loop of the instrumentals from the song on his iPod while walking to a party in New York City. Just as the chorus struck him, he arrived at the party. He knew it was a pivotal moment and he had to take advantage. He walks into the party, has 1 beer, then apologizes for having to leave because he doesn’t want to let the inspirational moment pass him by. He records the first iteration of the chorus on the voice recorder app on his iPhone while walking home. This is being a musician and a composer.

You are whatever you believe yourself to be. You become how you define yourself. I specifically avoid certain titles or labels because I don’t want to associate myself with being those things. I take care to label myself as things I want to reinforce about my character or that I want to be. It forces an a solidification of who I am and an evolution towards who I want to be. It pushes me closer to the adopting the mindset and flipping the switch to being when I’m ready for that.

It’s important to note that you can’t flip the switch until you’re completely ready. Labeling yourself will help you get to the point where you can have that mindset shift but sometimes you may not be fully prepared to do what it takes to be that type of person. You have to be willing to prioritize new behaviors over the current ones that are holding you back. I wasn’t ready to do the things I needed to “be healthy” until I couldn’t keep up with my 1 year old every night because I was overweight and tired. I always wanted to be fit, work out, and eat healthy but is was a distant desire, not a need. The switch didn’t come until I was mentally ready to make the shift to prioritize the right actions and behaviors. I had to align my priorities to being the type of person who eats right, makes time for working out, and gets 8 hours of sleep every night.

Define what you want to be. Label yourself as that. Do the things that type of person does. Become that type of person.

Good luck on your journey.